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Snitch has always been annoyingly good at pretty much all sports (though I reckon I could still beat him at a length of breaststroke). With his lean physique he is a good all-round athlete, though perhaps a little too lean some might say, earning himself the nickname of "Pencil Boy" at a young age.

But football is where Snitch really found his forte. Leading scorer since his debut for Hathersage Under 12s, Snitch has gone from strength to strength ever since he passed the 7-foot mark. A loyal player, he remained until joining the ranks of the men's team and manager Sven Goran Swinscoe had his way. Snitch could not handle being patted on the arse and being called "Planky Lad" any longer by the evil Swinscoe. Bigger and better things awaited Snitch on the horizon. A transfer request was put in at the earliest opportunity and the shock move of the season was completed to rivals, Grindleford.

Even this was not enough for the ever-hungry Crouch-a-like. Grindleford just didn't cut the mustard - despite coming up against the likes of Chris Waddle no less, and the Sheffield Wednesday All Stars - so after many long hard seasons, Snitch hung up his village boots and moved onto the dizzy heights of the Sheffield HSBC Sunday League team. Stardom awaits.

Snitch made his debut in the Preds last season with a storming cup run, losing out in the semi-final to eventual runner up, Billy. Planky Lad is serious about sport - the Preds will not be taken lightly.